How Do You Plan a Couples Therapy Retreat in Montclair, NJ?

Planning a couples therapy retreat in Montclair comes down to three things: choosing your dates, booking a place to stay if you’re traveling, and protecting the time between sessions. The therapy itself is two days, a 6-hour first day with 5 hours of counseling and a 5-hour second day with 4 hours of counseling. Many couples stay overnight downtown, have a quiet dinner after day one, and return the next morning to finish the work.

Once a couple decides to do a retreat, the next questions are almost always practical. Which days should we pick? Where do we stay? What do we do with ourselves between sessions? What should we bring?

These details matter more than people expect. The space around the sessions, the dinner, the walk, the night’s sleep, is part of what makes a retreat work. A little planning makes it easier to be fully present for the part that matters.

Here’s everything you need to plan it.

Step 1: Choose your dates

Weekday or weekend?
Your retreat can fall on weekdays or weekends. Pricing depends on when your sessions take place:

• Weekday: Monday through Thursday, with sessions ending by 3pm, starting at $4,000

• Thursday after 3pm, Fridays, and Saturdays: $5,000

• Sundays: $6,000

If your two days fall in different pricing windows, the full retreat is billed at the higher rate. For example, Friday and Saturday are both in the same window, so that retreat is $5,000. A Saturday and Sunday retreat is billed at the Sunday rate, $6,000.

A 50% deposit reserves your dates.

Back-to-back or a day in between?

• Back-to-back days keep the momentum going and work well for couples traveling a longer distance.

• A day in between gives you time to decompress, spend unstructured time together, and come back for day two with more distance from day one.

Both work. It depends on your schedule and how much space you think you’ll need.

Step 2: Know the schedule

Day one: a 6-hour day, with 5 hours of counseling

• Hour 1: Joint intake, together

• Hour 2: Individual session with partner one

• Hour 3: Individual session with partner two

• Hour 4: Break

• Hours 5 and 6: Couples session

During each partner’s individual hour, the other partner has a free hour. It’s a good time for a coffee, a short walk, or quiet time to reflect.

Day two: a 5-hour day, with 4 hours of counseling

• Hours 1 and 2: Couples session

• Hour 3: Break

• Hours 4 and 5: Couples session

For a closer look at what happens in each session, see Can You See a Couples Therapist Alone? and What Happens at a Couples Therapy Retreat?

Step 3: Book your stay

If you’re traveling to Montclair, staying overnight between sessions turns a long round trip into a true getaway, and gives you a calm place to land after day one.

Two options we often recommend:

• The MC Hotel, Autograph Collection
  Right in downtown Montclair, with its own restaurant and rooftop lounge. It’s convenient if you want everything within walking distance.

• The George
  A smaller boutique hotel nearby, a good fit for couples who want something quieter and more intimate.

  Book early, especially for weekends.

Step 4: Plan dinner after day one

The dinner after day one is often one of the most meaningful parts of the retreat. After a day of real support, many couples have their first calm conversation in weeks.

A few places nearby that work well for the evening between sessions:

• Faubourg Montclair
  French food and cocktails in a beautiful setting. A good choice if you want the evening to feel like a real night out.

• Laboratorio Kitchen
  Italian, and BYOB. It’s just a few minutes from the downtown hotels, and relaxed enough for a long, unhurried conversation.

• Zeugma Grill
  Mediterranean and Turkish food, a warm option for a quieter dinner.

Reserve ahead when you can, and check hours before you go.

A few tips for the evening:

• Choose a place where you can actually hear each other

• Keep alcohol light. Hard emotions tend to get harder with more drinks.

• Don’t try to re-do the whole session at dinner

• Talk about what felt different, not what went wrong

• Get to bed at a reasonable hour

Step 5: Use the breaks well

Each day includes a full one-hour break. On day one, it falls after the individual sessions and before the couples session, making it a good time for lunch. On day two, it falls between the two couples sessions.

Use the breaks to:

• Eat a real meal

• Step outside and walk

• Drink water

• Rest your mind, not your phone

Montclair’s walkable downtown makes it easy to grab something nearby without needing to drive.

Step 6: Handle logistics at home

The more you settle beforehand, the more present you can be.

• Arrange childcare for both days and the night in between if you’re staying over

• Set an out-of-office for work, and mean it

• Decide on phone boundaries together, ideally checking only during breaks

• Don’t tell everyone. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for taking two days for your relationship.

Step 7: What to bring

• Comfortable clothes and layers

• A water bottle

• A notebook or journal

• Any medications you need

• Snacks for the breaks

• An open mind, and some patience with each other

A sample weekday retreat itinerary

Day one

• Morning: Arrive in Montclair and begin your 6-hour first day, with a one-hour break midday

• Mid-afternoon: Check in to your hotel and rest

• Late afternoon: Take a walk downtown

• Evening: A quiet dinner together, without rehashing the whole session

• Night: Get to bed early

Day two

• Morning: Breakfast, then your 5-hour second day, with a one-hour break midday

• Early afternoon: Head home with a plan for what comes next

For weekday pricing, sessions need to end by 3pm. Exact start times are confirmed when you book.

Who plans a couples therapy retreat?

Couples choose a retreat for many reasons, including:

• Recovering from an affair or betrayal (read more)

• Breaking a recurring conflict cycle

• Deciding whether to stay together

• Living too far away for weekly in-person sessions

• Wanting meaningful progress without months of waiting

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you plan a couples therapy retreat?

Choose your dates (weekday or weekend, back-to-back or with a day in between), book lodging if you’re traveling, arrange childcare and time off, and plan a quiet dinner after the first day. The therapy schedule is set in advance, so the rest of your time is for rest and reconnection.

How much does a couples therapy retreat cost?

A 9-hour two-day retreat starts at $4,000 for weekday sessions ending by 3pm. Thursday evenings, Fridays, and Saturdays are $5,000, and Sundays are $6,000. If your two days fall in different pricing windows, the full retreat is billed at the higher rate.

Can we do a couples therapy retreat on a weekend?

Yes. Weekend retreats are available. A Friday and Saturday retreat is billed at $5,000, and a retreat that includes a Sunday is billed at $6,000.

Where should we stay for a couples therapy retreat in Montclair?

Many couples stay downtown at The MC Hotel, Autograph Collection, which has its own restaurant and rooftop lounge, or at The George, a smaller boutique hotel nearby.

Where should we eat between sessions in Montclair?

Good options for the evening between sessions include Faubourg Montclair for French food and cocktails, Laboratorio Kitchen for BYOB Italian, and Zeugma Grill for Mediterranean and Turkish food.

What should we bring to a couples therapy retreat?

Bring comfortable clothes, water, snacks for breaks, any medications you need, and a notebook or journal. Most importantly, bring an open mind and some patience with each other.

What do we do during the breaks?

Each day includes a one-hour break. Use it to eat, walk, drink water, and rest. On day one, each partner also has a free hour while the other is in their individual session.

Should we stay overnight or drive home between days?

It depends on your distance and preference. Couples traveling an hour or more often stay overnight, which turns the retreat into a getaway and gives you a calm place to land after day one.

The therapy happens in the room. But the shift often settles in at dinner, on a walk, or in a quiet hotel room the night between sessions.

So maybe the question isn’t how to fit a retreat into your life. It’s what your relationship could become if you gave it two days of your full attention.

Alexandria Lanza, LPC, LCADC, LPAT, ACS, is an EMDR-certified betrayal trauma specialist and founder of Jaded Hearts - Center for Healing in Montclair, NJ. She works with couples navigating infidelity, recurring conflict, and major relationship decisions through couples therapy retreats, intensives, and the Betrayal Recovery Program, in person in Montclair and virtually across New Jersey. Learn more about Alexandria or explore couples therapy intensives.

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